Enjoy it,  bitches.

Yesterday afternoon and evening were a bit better.  Dad was very much dad-like again, which is always a comfort.  And according to Mom, who wrote me a nice note before crashing out to catch some sleep, his night went much better as well. He slept more easily, and for longer stretches of time, and his respiration stayed in a good level.  She’s confident enough to try and work tonight… good deal, considering yesterday morning she was thinking of taking a leave of absence to keep a closer eye on him.  He should be able to come home Monday as planned.

Wish I could say the same for my night.  I came home, sat in the car for a while, left again, came back, had a beer, and then had a mild panic attack.  Which wouldn’t have been such a bad thing had I not been on the phone at the time.  I needed the release, without worrying about reigning it in for the benefit of party-two.  He wanted to stay on the phone with me.  I got nagged about hanging up, he wanted to stay that much.  I guess that should be a comfort, but… I don’t know.  There’s a very, very delicate balance between “leave me the fuck alone” and “please don’t go”.  A sort of, please be there, allow me the comfort of knowing you’re there, but don’t be so present that I should worry about what you’re thinking when I need to worry about calming myself down.  I guess it’ll take some practice.

After that episode, and after I had fully recovered (took about an hour?), the night went alright.  Still feeling a bit overwhelmed by this whole mess of life, but the worst of it has been expelled.  Like having a zit on yer ass, I reckon.  The pressure is off but it’s still going to hurt for a bit.

In other news, thanks to Kev’s inquisitiveness, I found out that Peter Heppner has indeed released his solo effort, imaginatively titled “Solo”.  International release dates are, unfortunately, still being negotiated.  But with the glory of the Inter-tube, who needs international release dates?  Soulseek to the rescue!  It’s not as great as Wolfsheim — only a few songs pack a somewhat similar sort of punch — but it’s still pretty good.  ‘Alleinesein’ was probably his best choice for a debut single, and definitely my favourite.  ‘No Matter What It Takes’ is also pretty striking.  The rest?  Well, it’s going to take some time to bond with.

Was in Big Lots today, rummaging around the DVD racks for cheap movies. Picked up a copy of Gattaca (hoorah!), and some random anime:

…is how much I’ve walked today, according to my w580i.  That’s 4.2mi, translating to a total of 407 calories burned by moving one foot in front of the other all repetative-like.  And I thought my mad-dashes across airport terminals were impressive.  Didn’t want to believe it til I sat down with a campus map and realized how ass-tastic my routes were today.  From #5 to Memorial Hall to POT to B&E to the Student Center to Funk and back to #5.  Next semester’s routes aren’t looking much better.

Sorry, I know “how much I walked” isn’t really blogworthy news.  I’ll get the hang of this again, I swear.

Anywho.  Got all registered for next semester.  My advisor gave me the lovely news that I do indeed qualify for SW322, which saves me 3hrs in the long run… so I opted to take my (bonus) lazy-semester this go-’round.  So basically, I’m taking one course that really matters, two courses I should’ve taken in clown college, and (finally) German.  Yes!  I can finally do more than get a train ticket! Or inform people that my hat is black and white!  Or tell people to hurry the fuck up!
[I'd like a ticket please -- and hurry the fuck up!]

I’m also pleased to report that my student ID photo doesn’t look like ass.

Came home to find my books finally came in from half.com.  I finally bought a copy of A Field Guide to Otherkin by Lupa, and Witch School: Lessons for the Second Degree by some cheesy looking fucker with a gnarly beard.  I really shouldn’t talk about the leader of the trad like that, but my elementary school teachers always told me that I shouldn’t tell lies, so there you go.  But don’t let the cheese fool you… you wouldn’t think that anything called “Witch School” would be serious or valuable, but I really love their approach, and their First Degree program was pretty much awesome.  Nothing I didn’t know already, but you have to go through the motions.
So I flipped through both.  Beelined right for the Angels section in Otherkin… just to see… and yes, I’m in there!  Looked at the TOC in Second Degree and saw there is a section on sex magick.  As always, they have a very solid and mature approach… but I couldn’t read it without flailing (I have a habit of flailing whenever I have one of those overwhelming in-love moments).  Sex is sacred, a union of the God and Goddess, a union of… flail… God… flail… union… FLAIL.

On the subject of sacred sexual symbolism, my lilies opened today :)  I don’t know if they opened this morning and I just didn’t notice (I was in a sort of rush), or if they popped when I was off burning calories, but it was a very nice treat to see that on returning home.  Ahhh, flowers.  Aaaaahhhh, guys that actually buy you flowers.  I always laughed at the idea of getting flowers, until I actually found someone who believes in ‘em… and they really are special.  All I have to do is look at them, and my face busts.
All I have to do is look at him, and my face busts.
All I have to do is think about him, and my face busts…